MANLY SHIT

Alright nerds, calm your raging fantasy boners.

You all know it; Lord Of The Rings is the fucking shit.

And do you know why?

Because of this hunk of fucking manliness right here, that’s why.

This is Aragorn, son of Arathorn, heir to the throne of FUCKING YOU IN THE ASS.

This motherfucker spends the whole movie looking after some midgets and beating up some ugly motherfuckers.

And do you know why?

Because chicks dig the family man.

Just LOOK at these bitches.

There he is, about to get deep into some Elven clunge, man.

He gets to fuck Liv Tyler.

LIV FUCKING TYLER.

And if THAT wasn’t enough swagger for you to handle, check this shit;

This little slut totally wants on the “Throne Of Gondor” if you know what I mean.

That’s right.

Eowen, Horse mistress…

And Aragorn is the fucking stallion.

So you’re thinking, wow, this Aragorn guy, what a legend.

Bet he takes precautions with the ladies, right?

FUCK NO.

THIS FUCKING LAD JUST STICKS IT IN WHATEVER, AND DOESN’T GIVE A FUCK ABOUT THE CONSEQUENCES.

CHECK OUT THIS MOTHERFUCKING DELETED SCENE.

HE LAUGHS IN THE FACE OF CONTRACEPTION.

11/10